After a long summer of traveling abroad (which deserves a post in its own right), I am finally back in California, living in my childhood home once again. And for some reason, I kind of like it?

Humans are social creatures, and yet it always seems to surprise me whenever I (re)learn that I am a social guy. Spending time with friends back home, reconnecting with people from high school, and rekindling relationships that felt lost to time has made this world feel so much bigger and full of possibility! In the past week alone, I’ve talked to more and saw more people than I have for the past 3 years combined. Some people will always be my best friends, and I don’t think anyone will take over their place, but it’s still so refreshing to be able to make and form connections with people before I enter a new stage of my life alone. I don’t feel completely unequipped and finally have some faith that loneliness won’t entirely get me.

That being said, I’ve also taken a good look at myself over the past few weeks of being home, and I still don’t always know who is looking back at me. I’ve made decisions that I’m not proud of, but don’t entirely regret either. But also, I feel more equipped to be a normal human than ever before. It’s so odd. I feel like I’m taking advantage of all of my own (human) character flaws that just became apparent to me.

In the end, I’m just a guy. And honestly, I’m still learning how to just be a guy. But I’m not too upset with where life has taken me, and I am holding on to that feeling as best I can.

🙂

-writer